Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Brave

I am brave.  Very brave.  I am full of abilities.  I was sitting here....worn out. Emotionally drained.  I did hard things today.  Signed up for my parenting class.  Got the parenting plan notarized.  Had to re-read all of the paperwork.  Emails.  Had to go to the court house.  And now...sitting here completely mush.  And then I began to think badly about myself.  My thoughts were "I am being lazy.  I need to get up and accomplish something." But I am so.....limp.  Cold.  Tired.  Then I remembered.  I did HARD things!! I was brave! I AM brave.  I didn't put it off.  Didn't whine.  Didn't give up.  Didn't lie down in a trembling mass.  I faced what I had to do and did it! And I'm going to give myself all of the time I need.  And I'm going to be nice to myself.  Even when I don't accomplish what I had hoped in a day because other things steal my energy.  But the best reason that I know that I am brave is because I did NOT give up my joy.  I chose to stop and remind myself.  To remember that I'm beloved.  And that I have come a long way.  And lived through a lot.  And am still living through a lot.  I'm going to forgive myself for not getting the housework done.  I'm going to watch some shows.  I might even close my eyes for awhile.  I'm worn out.  I'm not bad.
grace.

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