I Wonder

I wonder so many things.  I wonder when he'll leave.  Or if he'll leave.  I wonder where life will go from here.  For me.  I know that my kids will fly.  I wonder if my husband will ever figure out that life is absolutely about him in his mind and heart.  I wonder if I will sell this house.  Or change the room.  Or get a bed.  I wonder if I'll write my book.  I wonder if anyone would read it. I wonder if he'll ever understand how horrible it has been.  I wonder how much money I'm not going to have....:).  I wonder if I'll have any friends when it's all over.  I mean, any of these friends.  I wonder if I'll ever get to the point that I quit startling every time someone walks up.   I wonder when I'll figure out what I want to be when I grow up.  I wonder.
But my wonder has changed from worry.  And for that I am happy.  I wonder, but I'm not in a panic.  I am resting in where I am and looking forward to what will come next.
Hope you are wondering in your life too.....it's kind of....exciting.

blessings.