value

a couple of days ago, something amazing happened.  something that made me stop.  something that has kept me from writing for two days for lack of a way to put it to words.  a couple of days ago, i was spending time with someone.  we don't often have one on one time.  it was initiated by me...which is normal.  but, something happened that day that touched me.
we had been talking a little while when her phone rang.  she glanced and put it away.  i said, "you can get it."  she said, "no, it would be a chatty call and we don't have that much time together so i want to spend it with you."
we had over an hour left.
i was actually floored.
i didn't cry...then.  i didn't make it a big deal...then.  just said thanks and we went on.
oh, but the impact.
i realized how nice it felt to feel valued.
to feel more important.  or at least as important .
to be respected.
and it got me thinking.   why do i settle for so little?
why do i think that it's ok for everyone else to constantly come first when i'm with others.  calls. texts. other people.
i have allowed myself to become someone who just takes the leftovers.  and that's not good.  not when i'm giving the main dish.....the whole thing.
leftovers.
i think maybe i'm worth more than that.
and i think that if others don't treat me that way that i should spend time doing something else.
the act of kindness by my friend caused me to grow. to expect more of myself.  to respect myself more.  it caused me to feel valued because it happens so rarely.  it jumpstarted my behaving like i should be valued.
blessings.