good morning

hi.  happy sunday.

remember how i've been tired?  that hasn't changed.  though i've slept and rested.  i struggle with the journey sometimes.  and yet....what a wonderful journey it has been.

it's beautiful.  every day.  and even if i have to slow down, it's still amazing.  slowing down means that i get to stop and appreciate things better.  thankful.  being thankful no matter what comes.  no matter how hard it becomes.  some journeys that are walked with people all around are walked alone.  with others conveniently unaware of the deepest struggles.  of the pain.  

i am so very thankful that pain has been manageable.  that my body responds well to nutrition and better habits.  

yet, today, i just want to be energetic.  i don't want to have to push myself to be that way.  

but what is...is what is.  profound, huh?  so true.

so i will push through some of the lethargy.  the pain.  the tired.

and i will rise.

and get some things done.

and laugh with my children.

those things are healing.

they make life worth it.

even when it takes every last drop of strength.

what better can i give my strength to than my life?

no sense saving it.

life ends

but not yet.

right now, i have things to look forward to and things to plan for.

today i woke up sorry that i spent so many years with someone that sucked so much out of me.  but then i remembered that every person and every moment brought me to where i am now...was used by god to mold and shape and prepare...so, i take it, though i do wish that i could have back the strength and effort that i put into a person that simply didn't appreciate nor care for my brand of love.

ok.

have to put my feet on the floor and get a move on.

i know that i CAN.  i do it so often on these days.  so much so that nobody even notices.  but right now, i just want to turn over and go to sleep.  for about a week.  with someone waiting on me.

ha. :) i would hate that in short order, i think.

no. 

i bask in the chance to rise again.

the opportunity of a fine new day.

off i go.

enjoy yours.

blessings.