Though the world tells me that I need to open up and share those things that are hurting my heart, frustrating me, filling me up with ickiness, I am afraid that it's not true.
Tonight I shared how irritated and hurt I was about Saturday night being my son's last night and how my ex had simply usurped the time I had been planning and planned to have the kids over to dinner. I was expressing how difficult it was. And, she listened. Then, I got home. And my youngest tells me that it's a party. At the park. That he rented a pavilion. And invited everyone. I was floored. And how he wants them to go to a street festival on Friday night...my son's only other night off work. Seriously???
But the real kicker was that the friend that I was venting to was invited! Now, I feel like an idiot yet again. This whole friends being shared thing is so hard. Harder than I can tell anyone, because WHO would I tell? I've invested my life into people that he hung with too. I told him to be polite. That they were important. I fought for being hospitable. And NOW he decided to do so. Irritating.
But I need to learn to just not say it to other people. Makes me sad. Heartbroken even. But, it is what it is.
grace to you.
Tonight I shared how irritated and hurt I was about Saturday night being my son's last night and how my ex had simply usurped the time I had been planning and planned to have the kids over to dinner. I was expressing how difficult it was. And, she listened. Then, I got home. And my youngest tells me that it's a party. At the park. That he rented a pavilion. And invited everyone. I was floored. And how he wants them to go to a street festival on Friday night...my son's only other night off work. Seriously???
But the real kicker was that the friend that I was venting to was invited! Now, I feel like an idiot yet again. This whole friends being shared thing is so hard. Harder than I can tell anyone, because WHO would I tell? I've invested my life into people that he hung with too. I told him to be polite. That they were important. I fought for being hospitable. And NOW he decided to do so. Irritating.
But I need to learn to just not say it to other people. Makes me sad. Heartbroken even. But, it is what it is.
grace to you.
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