giving thanks

today, my kids are with their dad.  except for the one in college.  and the one that won't see him.  and the one that he didn't invite until tuesday and that already had plans.  but the two that live at home are with him.  and i wasn't sure how i would feel about that.  but, we were going to do something this morning.  and put up the christmas lights and....well, my ex texted my kids last night and said that he wanted to get them at 8:30 instead of 1:00.  So.
and i thought that maybe i'd be depressed. or mad. or lonely.
but i'm fine.  i'm good.
i have had a great week with my kids.  and a happy thanksgiving meal back on sunday.
i have moved on.  i'm ok.
does it trouble me that he doesn't make plans in advance?  yes.  but not enough to dialogue about it.  is it inconsiderate?  yes.  but i don't really expect anything else.
i am so thankful.
so relieved.
so light feeling.
and these other things are just a tad of inconvenience.
so i'll roll with it.
make my potato soup.
rest.
decorate.
putter.
and laugh.
and smile.
and be happy.
because i am full of joy.
and peace.
and hope.
life is pretty darn good.

my ex came to pick up the kids.  we let the dogs out to see him.  my dog barked at him..but then realized who he was.  my ex looked my way.  he was sad looking.  he looked like a victim.  and i felt sorry for him.  but finally, it's not my job to have to fix it all and make it ok.
that was something to be thankful for.
blessings.  i am thankful for all of you that walk this crazy journey with me!