failure

my daughter failed her driver's permit test today.  twice.  really.  and it probably hurt me just as much as it hurt her.  because failure hurts.  but, as my son was quick to point out, it also makes for people who are better and stronger in the future. she bawled her eyes out.  sobbed.  was embarrassed. and we got in the car and drove to denver.  it's about 40 minutes from our place in the world.  and she talked of how hard it was.  she doesn't do tests well.  has horrible test anxiety.  has for as long as i can remember.  she made mistakes that were due to knowing things a certain way and not reading the way the question asked it...opposite of how she knew it.  and on the first test, she changed one answer that would have been right and she would have passed.  really.  but we drove.  and went to the zoo.  and had some lunch there.  and watched the monkeys.  and saw the hippos.  and laughed at the hyena.  and oohed at the reptiles.  it was so much fun. though the pall of her failure drifted in and out of the day.  we left the zoo and headed to a ribs place.  it was closed two hours early....for winter hours.  paid five bucks to park and walk to the restaurant. :)  then we went a mile and a half to the other highly rated ribs place.  we parked on the street and then realized they had a lot!  we laughed so hard.  but the ache was there with us.  we...her brother and i..love her.  care for her.  she bombed.  but she had the grace to stand up.  to live.  to know that she'll do it again and pass.  eventually, she WILL pass. and we will celebrate.  but today we had to grieve.  today we had to cope.  today we had to grow stronger.  today, my son had to learn to say he was sorry for saying it was easy.  he learned something too.  and i learned how proud a mother can be when a daughter..or son..fails..but isn't defeated.
failure is but a stepping stone to success.  a bridge to the other side.  those who view it as a wall or deterrent are unaware that it is only failure for the moment  it can always spur a strong person on to the next great thing.
it was a beautiful day.
painful
but beautiful.
love my kids.
blessings.