Blessing in the Chaos

I have made a lot of chaos in my home.  Pulled things out.  Moved around.  It has been weeks.  But, slowly, a  little at a time, a dream comes closer.  A garden.  A game room.  Things how they need to be...not shoved aside.  it's hard work.  But the blessing of this kind of work is much like the blessing of introspection.  Forcing myself to look at things.  To deal with them.  Not to shove them.  I have to tell you that occasionally....I still put it in a drawer to deal with when I can.  Because some stuff is just too hard.  Too much.
But most of it...most of it is being dealt with as I go.  And I like that.  I have managed not to chuck photos...well maybe one or two.  I have managed to put away memories of marriage that my kids and grandkids should see one day......a long long long long time from now.
I am learning to keep the good and find the blessing in the painful moments.  Learning to be ok with being totally undone and knowing that that's ok.  And that my thoughts and emotions, like my house, will regain order and comfort if I keep at the work of going through, figuring out and dealing with the things.  Throw some out.  Leave some to others.  Put some away to look at in the future.  Mostly, keep things cleaned out and full of only the things that contribute to who I want to be.
Hard work.  Blessed work.
blessings.