Letting go of fear and wondering helps me to be more productive. I WANT to make my home mine. I want to enjoy it. I want it clean. Stressed that it's so hard to get kids to help KEEP it that way, but not in a bad way. Mostly, I'm just happy to see myself making progress.
This morning I almost gave up. Looked around my yard, garden, every room in my house. I was so disheartened with all of the work I have done and how unkempt it looks. But then I thought how much I've done in such a short time and it gave me hope. Looking at the good. Choosing each day. Giving myself the grace and time and kudos that I would give others. That's hard. I want to do it all and do it now!
Ordering carpet. Replacing the dishwasher. Replaced the water heater. Thinking of what to do about the fridge that has a broken ice maker. Fix or sell and put the money towards a new fridge. Scrubbing the cabinets and the baseboards. Contemplating painting. Soon.
Life is very good. Though I still get a sense of sad lonely and wondering of how I could ever have ended up being the one that people turned away from. I wonder why I have to have bitch status when really, I'm not. I will go out of my way for people. But.....still, not outgoing and charming. Socially lacking, I guess. Oh well. Not that social anyway.
blessings.
This morning I almost gave up. Looked around my yard, garden, every room in my house. I was so disheartened with all of the work I have done and how unkempt it looks. But then I thought how much I've done in such a short time and it gave me hope. Looking at the good. Choosing each day. Giving myself the grace and time and kudos that I would give others. That's hard. I want to do it all and do it now!
Ordering carpet. Replacing the dishwasher. Replaced the water heater. Thinking of what to do about the fridge that has a broken ice maker. Fix or sell and put the money towards a new fridge. Scrubbing the cabinets and the baseboards. Contemplating painting. Soon.
Life is very good. Though I still get a sense of sad lonely and wondering of how I could ever have ended up being the one that people turned away from. I wonder why I have to have bitch status when really, I'm not. I will go out of my way for people. But.....still, not outgoing and charming. Socially lacking, I guess. Oh well. Not that social anyway.
blessings.
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