New Things

Ok, I am learning to be brave and take risks.  Today I bought my first own laptop.  We bought one once upon a time when we had a business, but it wasn't really mine.  This one is mine.  I wish that I could tell you the password because it makes me smile.....but, I can't. 
I thought a lot about whether I wanted a laptop really badly or not.  And a part of me knows that I just have to have the outlet to write.  Regularly.  Without someone kicking me off or feeling guilty. 
So, I am quite jazzed to have the little baby.  It is little.  My requirements were really funny....small....able to hear my movies.....easy to use.....fast.....oh, and doesn't get hot.  So far, so good.
I really think that it's fun to write.  And, it has been a catharsis for me.  I breathe easier just having said what is on my mind.  I guess it's like I can leave it here.
Find how you cope.  Find what is healing for you.  Then, do it.  Faithfully.  Give yourself permission to do the thing that feeds your soul.  It will help you even if it doesn't change anything at all on the outside. 
I'm getting ready to take a walk again.  But, I'm waiting for it to not be so hot because it is stifling out there. 
Walking has really helped my mental attitude.  And my emotions.  I feel good about me. 
I've been happy.  Ridiculously happy.  And....nothing has changed.  Wait, I've changed!  And AM changing. 
God makes all things new.  My husband hasn't treated me better.  He hasn't said that he will.  But, I've learned a secret....that he does not hold the key to my happiness nor contentedness.  And I won't be giving it to him.  Because he misused it.
Well, guess I'd better look around at my new work tool. And maybe find a job. 
grace to you.