Lifted Up

I rarely go back and read my blog....just occasionally.  I did so this morning.  To the last few weeks.  And I see how I'm healing.  Still hurting.  But what I really see is how positive I can be even when things are really hard.  I go back to those blogs and I remember how crushed or beaten down I felt, but when I read it, I actually hear my voice of encouragement.  I have a voice.  It is encouraging.  It is a voice that believes that hard, huge, important, amazing things can be done.  And for a long time I shared that voice with others.  With my ex.  With my kids.  With my friends  With people who bumped into my life.  But finally, I am learning how to share it with myself again.  That is humongous.  It comforts me. Because there aren't a lot of people around who do that for someone who chose to separate from her husband.  Mostly I feel tsk tsked. 
However, there are people popping up in life who see me.  Who ask me and want to know.  Who seem to want to follow through.  And that is good.  Very good.  Of course, I have my bestie.  She doesn't falter.  She uplifts.  But....I don't want to drag her down.  I want to also be good for her.  Able to laugh again. 
Healing is happening...even in the past week when I was overwhelmed by his words. God IS faithful.  Completely. 
blessings.