Our lives are a journey that we walk together not in order to become "good christian women," but rather to draw near to God so that we can reflect His light to those around us. Our stories, our paths, our dreams and our message are all unique. But we hold hands and walk boldly, fearlessly......onward...creating joy, hope, faith and peace in our wake.

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Hope He Had Fun

My ex went to the play of the son of a common family.  Took our daughter.  It is weird.  He didn't do things like this.  Glad that I didn't go tonight.  Glad that I hadn't promised to.  But mostly....I hope that he went to have fun and be supportive and not to gain points or be manipulative.  He spent so many years all about him that all his current behaviors feel like is a game.
And maybe they are.  Or maybe they are not.  Not my job to figure out.  He just needs to live.  And quit trying to make it about me.  I don't want to be with him anymore.  He can stop the victim act.  He can give up the poor me stance.  He needs to grow up and have a life without it being about showing people how it's all my fault.  I'll take that responsibility.  And then...I'll move on.
But, I'm tired and it was an emotional day and I just want him to stop.  Good news is that I don't live with him anymore.  I'm daily.....even more than that....glad to be free.
I had a good night.  Watched shows on Netflix most of the afternoon.  Did a little pick up.  Not much. Didn't cook.  Didn't interact much.  Just taking care of me today.  That was a full time job.
blessings.

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