Today, I have been cleaning out a cupboard full of old phone books and whatever else people stick in there. On the bottom of the shelf, I found an old set of notes from a sermon. Mine. It was called Ode to Joy.
Joy thiefs:
Problem focus
Adverse cirumstances
People problems
Aloneness/loneliness
Trying to earn salvation
Anxious thoughts.
This sermon was based on Philippians.
Twas lovely. And timely. Just as I was writing how thankful for this reminder, I got a call from my oldest son...the one with a wife and two kids.....and he said that they are heading out from TX today. Yes, on Christmas. Because they have been told that they can't be in his uncle's and aunt's house while they are gone and that they won't be home until midnight. They have a kid with over a 101 temp. Sick. Really sick. Tummy problems too. They are going back to her family. Hopefully taking my middle son with them. Even if we have to ship their stuff. Somehow. They were forced to use a bathroom across the house. Forced to be gone if the rest of the family was gone. Couldn't use the bathroom by their room...though two of them are really sick. Even if it could be sterilized afterwards. He tried to talk to his dad about this problem. His dad said he had to go play a game. So, they are heading out after lunch. Wow. Really? I finally see it though. See the co-dependence. See that everyone is afraid of going against and of not pleasing. Nobody is allowed to be his or her own person. My ex is playing the victim. Still. In front of all of our kids. It's....awkward. That's putting it mildly. My mild mannered daughter in law used bad language to describe the situation...and how they are being basically tossed out on Christmas. Weird. But true.
They won't give my middle son wireless access. They set it so that he can't get on. And think that it's funny. Mean to him. He is sitting in the bedroom. Wow. What a missing out they are experiencing.
I am waiting to hear what I should do. Middle son doesn't have his phone charger. Obviously didn't get to borrow one. Sigh. Maybe they think that by holding him prisoner that will make it all better. All I know is that my ex has sealed his fate....at least temporarily...and made it even more difficult to make amends. No matter what he SAYS now, the action and inaction of this trip will be more real. It took me years to see the problem. Years.
Now, my middle son graduates this coming spring. And I wonder......will he want this same family to come to his graduation? And I wonder.....will they...especially the one uncle.....be hurtful enough to not come? Oh God, don't let my sweet boy be hurt anymore. Please oh please.
He wants to leave there. Yet, still doesn't want to make anyone uncomfortable. I know how he feels.
OK, it has been a few hours...just getting back to this. leaving to get my darling boy. Who is also a pain at times.:) A true teen. Off to get him....because I love him so very much.
blessings.
Joy thiefs:
Problem focus
Adverse cirumstances
People problems
Aloneness/loneliness
Trying to earn salvation
Anxious thoughts.
This sermon was based on Philippians.
Twas lovely. And timely. Just as I was writing how thankful for this reminder, I got a call from my oldest son...the one with a wife and two kids.....and he said that they are heading out from TX today. Yes, on Christmas. Because they have been told that they can't be in his uncle's and aunt's house while they are gone and that they won't be home until midnight. They have a kid with over a 101 temp. Sick. Really sick. Tummy problems too. They are going back to her family. Hopefully taking my middle son with them. Even if we have to ship their stuff. Somehow. They were forced to use a bathroom across the house. Forced to be gone if the rest of the family was gone. Couldn't use the bathroom by their room...though two of them are really sick. Even if it could be sterilized afterwards. He tried to talk to his dad about this problem. His dad said he had to go play a game. So, they are heading out after lunch. Wow. Really? I finally see it though. See the co-dependence. See that everyone is afraid of going against and of not pleasing. Nobody is allowed to be his or her own person. My ex is playing the victim. Still. In front of all of our kids. It's....awkward. That's putting it mildly. My mild mannered daughter in law used bad language to describe the situation...and how they are being basically tossed out on Christmas. Weird. But true.
They won't give my middle son wireless access. They set it so that he can't get on. And think that it's funny. Mean to him. He is sitting in the bedroom. Wow. What a missing out they are experiencing.
I am waiting to hear what I should do. Middle son doesn't have his phone charger. Obviously didn't get to borrow one. Sigh. Maybe they think that by holding him prisoner that will make it all better. All I know is that my ex has sealed his fate....at least temporarily...and made it even more difficult to make amends. No matter what he SAYS now, the action and inaction of this trip will be more real. It took me years to see the problem. Years.
Now, my middle son graduates this coming spring. And I wonder......will he want this same family to come to his graduation? And I wonder.....will they...especially the one uncle.....be hurtful enough to not come? Oh God, don't let my sweet boy be hurt anymore. Please oh please.
He wants to leave there. Yet, still doesn't want to make anyone uncomfortable. I know how he feels.
OK, it has been a few hours...just getting back to this. leaving to get my darling boy. Who is also a pain at times.:) A true teen. Off to get him....because I love him so very much.
blessings.
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