Living

I have been going full out.  And today it occurred to me how awesome that is.  Not just being busy, but being passionate.  Doing something well.  Trying hard.  Making good things happen.  It's quite a rush.  In the midst of the absolute exhaustion.  But it feels good to be here on my bed worn out and tired from real work. From a paycheck job and from an "I get to make things cute" job.  My body HURTS.  I am soooo tired.  But I feel good.  Why get to the end of my life having saved my energy?  Might as well use it up each day as it is given.  Might as well take the risk.
I met a woman today that has always wanted to live at the beach.  She is moving to a place she heard about in Florida that has affordable cost of living.  She'll be right on the water.  She moves at the end of the year. Wow.  Brave.
Why do I always wait?  Hesitate?  Not that I'd move right now...have to consider my kids.  But on so many things, I hang back.  I want to live.  To try.  To move on and forward.
Yes, I am so very tired.  But I am also happy.
blessings.