Invisible No More

Something really good happened yesterday.  And, though I wrote last night, I couldn't find the words for what I wanted to say in my very tired brain.  They were still rattling 'round in my heart....like clothes in the dryer on the fluff cycle.  So, I laid down and fell asleep and dreamed and awoke....and when I did, it was time to write.  Though my body is still very tired, my brain was ready to "work".
So, I got a birthday gift yesterday.  I know, and I didn't even tell you that it was my birthday.  Well, it wasn't.  It's a little over six months since my birthday passed.  But, a friend was creating a piece of art....for me.  Yesterday it was finally complete.  This friend has an artist's heart.  She is compassionate and she can pull so many things together in one piece of beauty.  She told me that it was done.  Invited me over to watch a favorite show later on.  But, in my rounds of delivering kids, I was there at her house and got to see my present.  It's (I paused here for a long time trying to put it to words) simply beautiful.  Oh, the art is wonderful, the techniques that she has used are amazing, and the words she implemented, absolutely,  incredibly, perfect.
Not invisible.  Here.  Precious in His sight.
It felt like it must feel when someone has their lung punctured in a car accident and is waiting for the medics to "reinflate" it.  The burst of air must be a huge relief.  And, the breath that entered my chest was huge.  Deep.  Life giving.  Hope giving.  Oh yes, the art itself was lovely, IS lovely.  But the sense of being known and cared about..........priceless.  Who can adequately describe a piece of art to someone?  It just doesn't happen.  Because art is more than its elements.  It has life and heart.  It has meaning and inspiration.  And this piece gave me exactly what I needed all wrapped up in beauty.  My friend gave me a tangible, visible gift that reached into my heart and pulled out my hurts and hopes and showed me that she chooses to know me.  Chooses to care.  She took what she knew of me and mixed it with the wonders of who she is and made something amazing.  Just like our friendship.
I don't know how she did it.  How it all came to her.  But I know that one portion came to her while she was in the hospital having surgery.  They gave her some pain meds that didn't work for her and she had hallucinations in the night.  In that time, she needed paper to write down the thought that came to her about my birthday present.  That will always make me laugh.
She and I have been through many things through the years.  Really good and fun things.  Really deep things.  Really difficult things.  Really funny things.  You name it.  And we've both been strong.  And both been weak.  Very different.  Yet, with important enough similarities to unite us.  And the fact that she could condense my life at the moment to a few words and touch me so deeply is life changing.
I forget sometimes.  Forget that when the world is running all around like crazy people and that nobody sees who I am or cares....I forget the simple fact that she has......and does.  Maybe because I'm so afraid that she won't anymore.  Yes, that is truly it.  Like trying to brace myself against the "inevitable"......because I thought that if I did it right in the rest of my life that it would make it good.  Thought that I would be loved.  Then, I thought that if I behaved the right way that it would hold it all together.  But, nothing holds someone to us.  Only their choice.  Sometimes, I forget how she chose to be my friend.  Not by accident, but purposefully.  And, more than that........has chosen to stay.
The physical gift itself is a thing of beauty, but the kindness which it represents is beyond describing.  A true lifetime gift.
Not invisible.
Here.
Precious in His sight.
It makes me feel............treasured.
grace to you.