Our lives are a journey that we walk together not in order to become "good christian women," but rather to draw near to God so that we can reflect His light to those around us. Our stories, our paths, our dreams and our message are all unique. But we hold hands and walk boldly, fearlessly......onward...creating joy, hope, faith and peace in our wake.

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

determined...at one year mark.

not stubborn.  determined.  ready to go the distance.  ready to make a new life.  it's not easy.  it takes a tremendousy amount of learning...and relearning.  i have had to figure out how to be kind to myself.  how to trust without being used.  i have had to change how i think.  how i respond.  i have had to monitor my thoughts.  i don't just like the idea.  it's not just my goal.  i am determined.  i will no longer live as i once did.  a year ago today i walked into a courthouse and put in papers for a legal separation.  i was brave.  i was determined to change my life.  to live differently.  to honor god with who he made me to be.
a year ago.  wow.  he moved out nearly a month later.  not quite, but nearly.  three months from this date, i went to court for finalization.  final.  my ex doesn't hear that.  he doesn't hear that i finally knew that is what i had to do.  he doesn't get that i mean it.  but i am determined to live.  fully.  faithfully.  lovingly.  kindly.  joyfully. peacefully.  and i have had a pretty good year.  a really good year.  though i've cried and struggled and faced a lot of emotional upheaval.  it has been healing.  i have grown.  i have learned.  i am becoming a woman that i will be able to be proud of.
blessings.

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