it has been a long while. i am diligent about the things i know that cause my migraines. but, i should have felt this one coming on this week. thinking back....i knew. i just didn't put it together. too much else on my mind. that was what pushed me over...the too much else.
so, i got up. i'm doing my "routine." the good thing is that it's a wake up call for me. this stress IS destroyingme. living in dread. constantly knowing that i need to filter or curb what i feel, want or think. i didn't used to do that in my life. now it comes so normally. and i am battling against it. battling to be free. the battle was won. yet here i am. still a soldier. He fought for me so that i can fight now. not with words or to win about an idea. but so that life itself can be won. lived. freely.
a headache is not a good thing. unless it serves as a reminder. a wakeup. what has been happening over the years might have been silent to everyone else. unseen. but, my body itself has known. has rebelled. and i need to listen and remember how to take care of it.
the stress level is high. feel like i should get one of those fire danger signs. except that fire has already broken out.
funny how the headache has reminded me and given me hope. That i don'tneed or have to live like i have. that there is something better. and i can make it until then. i've made it through many nights. usually all on my own.
i'm going to be just fine.
grace.
so, i got up. i'm doing my "routine." the good thing is that it's a wake up call for me. this stress IS destroyingme. living in dread. constantly knowing that i need to filter or curb what i feel, want or think. i didn't used to do that in my life. now it comes so normally. and i am battling against it. battling to be free. the battle was won. yet here i am. still a soldier. He fought for me so that i can fight now. not with words or to win about an idea. but so that life itself can be won. lived. freely.
a headache is not a good thing. unless it serves as a reminder. a wakeup. what has been happening over the years might have been silent to everyone else. unseen. but, my body itself has known. has rebelled. and i need to listen and remember how to take care of it.
the stress level is high. feel like i should get one of those fire danger signs. except that fire has already broken out.
funny how the headache has reminded me and given me hope. That i don'tneed or have to live like i have. that there is something better. and i can make it until then. i've made it through many nights. usually all on my own.
i'm going to be just fine.
grace.
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