i have not written about my best friend these past days. it has been too vulnerable. she has been kind to me in this holiday season..my kids are gone...but she helps to make things feel normal. she doesn't diminish my pain, but she provided activity the day they all left. it was probably halfway into the day before i realized that most likely she hadn't really needed the shopping trip that day. she stayed out though she was sick. she went to a book store with me. her compassion is touching. while i don't really hear from people, and frankly, simply didn't expect to, she checks in. she doesn't make it awkward or make it like she's hovering or being inconvenienced. yet, she texts to see if i'm making it. just the fact that she understands that i might not be....is kind. caring.
her heart is so gentle. but with a strength and dedication. she soothes. she encourages.
she even invited me over to eat on christmas day. i am smart enough not to say yes, don't worry. i haven't lost all of my good sense. but the fact that she was willing to ask for a day that she has with all of her kids...which is rare...was a gift in itself. it's not the having to go. not having to be somewhere. just the being allowed to know that i was cared about can be enough.
her tattoo artist son joked the other day that we should get mizpah tattoos when we are old. kinda silly sounding, but then again....while i am not a tattoo person....it also makes me smile. because i was gifted with that kind of friend. the david and jonathan friend. where it's not just when convenient. and it's not just when things are needy. it just.....is. i have given up trying to explain it and instead just am thankful.
she makes me a better, braver person. and stays even when i'm not. she has the heart of a true friend.
and this christmas, as i am counting up my gifts..it's way at the top. the gift of friendship.
don't get me wrong. i have lots of friends. or, at least, i did. i am thankful for all of them. each a unique and special individual. but this friend is the forever kind of friend. the kind of friend that i can picture being silly when we are 90. that is a happy thing. very happy.
blessings.
her heart is so gentle. but with a strength and dedication. she soothes. she encourages.
she even invited me over to eat on christmas day. i am smart enough not to say yes, don't worry. i haven't lost all of my good sense. but the fact that she was willing to ask for a day that she has with all of her kids...which is rare...was a gift in itself. it's not the having to go. not having to be somewhere. just the being allowed to know that i was cared about can be enough.
her tattoo artist son joked the other day that we should get mizpah tattoos when we are old. kinda silly sounding, but then again....while i am not a tattoo person....it also makes me smile. because i was gifted with that kind of friend. the david and jonathan friend. where it's not just when convenient. and it's not just when things are needy. it just.....is. i have given up trying to explain it and instead just am thankful.
she makes me a better, braver person. and stays even when i'm not. she has the heart of a true friend.
and this christmas, as i am counting up my gifts..it's way at the top. the gift of friendship.
don't get me wrong. i have lots of friends. or, at least, i did. i am thankful for all of them. each a unique and special individual. but this friend is the forever kind of friend. the kind of friend that i can picture being silly when we are 90. that is a happy thing. very happy.
blessings.
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