Truth and Denial

Here's the thing I'm learning:  if some people remain in denial to the truth then there is nothing that I can or should do to hurry along their process.  It's not my job to tell them how they are wrong.  It's not my job to point out the errors in their thought processes.  It's my job to live the truth.  I didn't for a very long time.  Not purposefully.  I thought that the "game", the "show" was the marriage.  That I had to make it look good.  That I had to do everything in my power to hold it together.  I thought that it was my job to make us a happy family.  I wanted my kids to be happy.  Safe.  But what I didn't realize is that building it upon a fake, a facade, a poser, a sham.....just made them fall harder.  And the truth of the matter is that their dad got away with things that he should have had to answer for all along the way.
I am not getting back together with him.  I don't have to explain it to everyone.  I don't have to explain it to anyone.  All I have to do...is live.  As truthfully and as kindly as I can learn to do.  Over time.  With grace.  For others.  For myself.
But there is a lot of denial out there from others about my ex.  How good he is.  How kind.  He is selfish.  Amazingly so.
You know that friend that left the present along with the note about how they are praying for temporary emotions not to be......I don't know...but the gist was not to let temporary things ruin the permanent....THAT friend?  Well, I had forgotten that I had given them rent for their home.  Completely forgotten.  But that was me.  Not him.  Not the ex.  Me.  Not together.  He takes and has received credit for so much over the years.  And the funny part?  I had totally forgotten about the rent.  Completely washed it out of my mind.  I don't keep track nor try to make sure that someone evens the score.  But, when reminded, it struck me as funny....that my own kind act is being used to show how good we were together when it was that part of me that caused him trauma.
It is a little hurtful that he has been asked if he needs help.  That people rally around that poor victim.  But the TRUTH remains the same no matter what game he plays.  No matter how he pretends.  Matters not.  And whether he recognizes the truth or feels badly about it or completely misses it or denies it...the truth changes not.  And I have no need to convince anyone.