Beyond My Understanding

Ok, sometimes things just....blow me away.  My husband went to my friend's house....his friend too....but the friend that i bought a weedeater with.  He had used the weedeater previously and used up all of the twine on it.  Left it that way.  After it took me some time to get it all set up.  I bought the weedeater so that I would have one that works.  He has two others.  They are finicky.  I can't use them.  I wanted one that I could use.  He won't get the ones fixed that he has...but chastised me for buying a new one.  NOW, he takes the one I bought so that my friend and I could do what we need to and claims it as his own.  He isn't even buying more twine...he's putting on the other head that came with a free sample of another kind of twine.  I am astounded by the selfishness.  By the fact that he takes over everything without thought of anyone else.  He tells me he can fix his.  But, he won't.  He tells me that we don't need it....but he takes it.  I am hurt.  I got it so that I could do what I needed.  I took the time to choose it and get it ready.  I used money to get it that I earned.  But, I hardly even got a chance to use it before he took it over.  I'm not a selfish person.  I like to share.  I don't like the sense of his using me.  Of dominating.  Of taking.  He didn't ask to use it.  He didn't return it as he found it.  He simply did with it what he wanted and left it.
My son was getting ready to go to college and had to retrieve his tools...two sets.  His dad had taken them from him and never returned them.  Two FULL sets.  Nice sets.  He went looking and found most of the pieces around. 
It's habitual.  His idea is that he is supposed to possess what any of us have.
Today, he was asking my son for the shoes he was wearing....for when cross country was over.  That he would take them.  My sons wear their old cross country shoes for work and play and their new ones to run in.  I was flabbergasted.  How could it be that he would say such a thing?  If he wants shoes, he should get off of his butt and go buy some.  What a strange thing to in front of friends ask your son for his shoes and say that you haven't had new tennies in three years.  I wear my second oldest sons shoes from about 5 years ago...shoes he ran hard in for a season.  I don't make a big deal of it.  I certainly don't try to guilt my kids or tell my kids in front of everyone that maybe I need their shoes because I don't have any.
It really is beyond my understanding.  Mostly how I could have been so stupid.  What a jerk.  A selfish jerk.  That is way nicer than the word in my head.  I want to shout it....loudly and freely...............but, I am hiding here writing away.  So, I better not.  I need to escape.  Don't know where to go.  Here come those tears again.  I hate this.  Hate that all I want is for him to disappear...namely because then I'd have to feel guilty for feeling relieved.  I rarely admit that.  Better get.
grace to you.