Got An Appointment. Now What?

It seems like those who think that I'm having a hard time think that a "professional" is going to tell me what to do to make my life better.  I don't think that is the case.  I don't think that it is possible for any person to do that.  I think that what they do is ask questions, lead, guide, hope and help........and know that people have to find their way.  We each must live our own lives.  And take our own responsibility.  Without blaming someone or something for how we are.
It is difficult for me to picture spending much time going to a counselor.....not because I don't adore and respect and admire the woman that I have chosen....but because in the end, what I know is that I have to make choices.  I have to live new.  I have to keep asking the hard questions.  But here's the thing.  I DO that.  Already.  Because it's how I am wired.  It's how I work.  Yes, even about myself.  I know that this marriage has had some good fruit.  These kids are pretty awesome.  People that I couldn't imagine not having in my life.  Who live and give and think and do.........my gift to them is the ability to choose and to think.  Not to be afraid of failing.  To love fully.  To know that life is short and to make amends quickly.  I have done well.  And, that's not bragging.  They are a result of many years of nearly single parenting.
Even now, he works 60 or so hours a week and does extra curriculars.  He is home on Saturday when I run and hide, but he is busy doing projects.  Sad for the relationships.
The thing is that i am going to a counselor but I have to figure out what it means.  What it needs to be for me.  Feels like I'm opening the dam on things.  Worries me to let someone that is on the outside in to the private parts of life.  I don't want to harm him.  But, I want to stop letting him harm me.
Maybe I can keep living in the way we are now.  Quietly knowing that it's not working but letting the kids be ok.  Not sure what is best.  Really don't know.  I think that he will make it hard if I tell him he needs to go.  He has yelled and bawled before in front of the kids.  Blaming me.  Making a scene.  I really don't want that.  I want to be kind.
I loved with such fervor.  In a way that I never knew that I could.  But, loving someone does not make them love you back.  It does not make them want your best.  Sometimes it just allows them to take advantage of the fact that you love so deeply.
But do I really want to explain this to someone else?  I'm not certain.  It seems.....difficult.  It seems....unnecessary.  Because the bottom line is that......I have to figure this out with God.  With His guidance and His plan.  But, if it makes everyone feel better, then I guess I should do my best.
Grace