I come to the coast. My energy is up. I feel like me. I have had a couple of walks....90 steps to get down...90 to get up. I haven't fainted. I've cooked. I've cleaned up. Easy for two. ;) This is the first time in so long that I feel free. I feel comfortable. At ease. I am so thankful. And.....I realize.
I realize that it's not simply being at sea level. It's being free from the obligation to make things right for him. From the fear of his showing up. I get to.......be at ease. That is a gift that most take completely forgranted. Not me. I relish it. I soak it up. I sense the hugeness of what it will be to be this way as the norm. I would actually be me. Strong. Full of life. Able. Fun. Joy seeking. Giving. Encouraging. And being given to as well. I look forward to those days. They will come. They are coming. Because I am choosing them one at a time. I am able to make good choices.
grace to you.
I realize that it's not simply being at sea level. It's being free from the obligation to make things right for him. From the fear of his showing up. I get to.......be at ease. That is a gift that most take completely forgranted. Not me. I relish it. I soak it up. I sense the hugeness of what it will be to be this way as the norm. I would actually be me. Strong. Full of life. Able. Fun. Joy seeking. Giving. Encouraging. And being given to as well. I look forward to those days. They will come. They are coming. Because I am choosing them one at a time. I am able to make good choices.
grace to you.
No comments:
Post a Comment
Go ahead. Make my day. Leave me a comment.