Inside My Head

Perhaps most of this should just stay "inside my head."  I know that it's painful stuff.  I know that others face painful stuff too....so, I write.  To get it out of my head, but also to help others see that they are not alone in the pain and rejection.
Speaking of rejection, it's really an interesting phenomenon to me that though I was the rejected, my husband now turns it into how I am the one doing this.....and I see it.  I waited.  I tried.  I applauded him.  I encouraged.  And so, for me to finally have had enough is pretty much unfathomable, I guess.
Anyway, today I am trying to not bother anyone in the world.  Simply live my life.  Because sometimes I do so much reaching out that I am a nuisance.  It's how I've been coping.  But, I don't want to wear out those who love me.  So, I'm practicing living inside my head and being content.  And look....I've gone nearly a whole day without the sustenance of those who understand.  And, it is sustenance.  As surely as food is.  I feel it just like I feel fasting.
But, I will be fine.  I think.
grace to you.