Our lives are a journey that we walk together not in order to become "good christian women," but rather to draw near to God so that we can reflect His light to those around us. Our stories, our paths, our dreams and our message are all unique. But we hold hands and walk boldly, fearlessly......onward...creating joy, hope, faith and peace in our wake.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Dreams and Emails

I had a dream last night of telling him.  I saw that look in his eyes...the one that rarely flashes...is usually controlled.  And, strangely, in my dream, I paused and looked at the look and purposed to remember it when I awoke.  The raw anger.  But, tell him I did.  In my dream.  And, I can tell that means that I've just about worked through things. ;)
I have composed an email in my mind addressing the things we need to address.  I think that will help me to broach things and give him time to think too.
And, I told someone far away.  She didn't take it too well.  All about how it can still work out.  It's funny.  I know that.  I even believe it.  I just can't deal with that right now.  But she wasn't horrible.  I am learning to say what I need to say.  And...without blame.  That is SO hard.  Just want to throw something else out there.  I did that with my one friend, but I am trying not to.  No juicy tidbits.  Just a decision.
Time is coming at the beach.  Found a place.  A good place, I think.  Can't wait to see my boy.  And relax in the most likely rainy weather.  I need it.  It will be wonderful.
grace to you.

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