Finding My Way

You know, I really like my subbing work.  Yet, I am not really up to new school after new school.  I now realize that those are the days that stress me beyond belief.  Though, I have done it.  Though I CAN do it.  I think that I am going to work on working at the schools that I already know well.  Work on getting more "full time" work at those.  Because that's what I need right now.  I don't just need ANY work, I need work that helps build up my confidence as well as give me a paycheck.  So, I am going to pray to work at those schools  where I feel comfortable for now.
That is a big step for me.  It has taken me these couple of weeks to realize that I don't have to do everything and be strong enough on every front.  I get to choose what is most important and how to face it.  And I can give myself grace when I can't do it.  Or when it feels like too much.
I can face a lot.  But I don't have to make it harder.  I can choose to do the things that I know that I can do well and feel good about.  I can choose to give myself the same benefit of kindness that I would give another if she were in my shoes.  I don't do that often.  I push myself until I absolutely can't do it.  However, it seems that I am learning a new way.  Finding my way.  In a new time of life.  I'm finding that I don't have to take the hard way to punish myself or to prove myself.  I can simply prayerfully and carefully......choose.
grace to you.