Artist of a Kind

So often I long to be an artist.  To put my hand to clay or paint, pen or pencil, marker or fabric....anything, really.  Just to make it turn into what is in my mind.  To be able to see something with the eyes of an artist.  It's such a gift.  So many people benefit.
Today, I was at school.  I realized that I am a teacher artist.  No, I don't teach art....well, in the midst of other things, I do, but I mean something more.  I see children.  I see classrooms.  I see how to teach each child.  I see how to organize the room.  How to manage it.  I don't even have to consciously work at it.  It all just kind of falls together in my mind.
I have sold myself short for so many years.  My housekeeping skills are not my great art .  My husband doesn't think of me as great at anything.  With him everything is a competition, and I never get to win.  So, after time, I became accustomed to not being the talented one.  Not having the skills.  I allowed the artist within me to become discouraged.  That person in me that has great potential.  Needs lots of work and practice, but has the basic skills.
I am an artist of a kind.  My medium is a classroom. 
I am an artist of a kind.  My other medium is words.
Both are dreams.  Might as well dream big......since I am apparently making very big decisions.  And I'm not supposed to make them about my own life.  Too bad I don't believe that anymore. 
Off I go on the journey....to learning what I can become with who I am.  I am practically giddy with anticipation.  When I can get out of feeling guilty. And, when he's not looking at me like I should be ashamed of myself.