When I Fall Down

I've realized that most of my life I have figured that if I fall down, I am going to have to get back up.  I used to think that I had to do that on my own.  But, years ago, God saw fit to send a really great lady into my life when I was just a kid.  She was a safety net.  She taught me how to need people.  Fast forward on to college, and I had great friends.  I needed them and they me.  It was a good time of growth and learning to stand while also learning to lean.  Then came marriage.  And babies in the baby carriage.  And, for awhile it was a really dry spell.
I cried a lot those first years.  I was incredibly lonely.  Nothing more pathetic than a mama at the mall with her kids all by herself.  Oh, except for the same mama at the park with her kids, all by herself. 
Funny, I prayed to have that hole in my heart filled.  And it was.  When I fall down, I don't have to get up all alone.  Sometimes, I choose to.  Sometimes, I withdraw.  Sometimes, I am a complete horse's butt.  Not because I don't need the help, but because in these ensuing years I have begun to question my value more and more.  But now, I take a deep breath.  I ask myself what I really want and what I really need.  Then, I try to do that instead of running away or trying to go it alone.  When I fall down, my friends laugh.  Literally.  With me.  At me.  They make me smile again.  At least as best as I can.  For that, every day.  Every moment.  I am so very thankful.