Needs

Been thinking in my little brain what needs I have.  I am pretty sufficient.  Not too needy.  At least, not normally.  But there are things that throw the balance off.  I think that I've known this about myself for a long time.  Because I am a hold it together kind of person for myself and others, through the years, I have had many friendships and relationships that require my constant input.  It's not back and forth, it's give, keep things going, keep up the conversation.....those drain me.  Absolutely.  If someone was my friend and has no interest in keeping up with me, then I guess that we don't have to.
This happened to me recently.  Someone came into town and didn't even tell me.  But, she was in a hurry....kinda flying through.  When I was on my way to her town, I called.  Emailed.  To this day, weeks later, I have not heard from her.  Unfortunately, it hurts my feelings because I will hear from her if she wants something from me....but not just to touch base with me. 
I am good with not being made that important.  Not that I have to think that I'm not, but I guess that I've always just let it be that way.  Early training?  Not sure.  But, allowing that in a marriage...toxic.  Way bad.  Disaster. 
I need to be seen.  I need time from those who care.  I need to be able to be me. 
I need time to be to write.  To think.  Not necessarily alone....just at peace.  Alone together is a good thing for me.  And, I need good rest.  I have been completely worn out.
I must change this.  If I am going to work even more hours then I've got to figure out a way to feel rested after the night.  So far, I struggle with this.  Perhaps it will improve.  Taking my vitamins again. 
I need to not feel like I'm doing everything wrong.  That destroys me.
I need to be allowed to have needs.