Anyone who thinks that the greatest tiring activity is running or bicycling or mountain climbing is sorely mistaken. The most tiring thing in the world is to deal with a bunch of emotional garbage. Sifting through feelings and events to create order. Shoveling out the crap and cleaning out a life so that it is fit to live in again.
It wears me down. And yet....it has that good feeling that comes from really hard work. Though it looks like I'm doing nothing. I have a sense of accomplishment. I am proud of myself. Even when it looks like I'm just sleeping. Learning to rest is huge for me. Learning to take the time to simply think. Or give myself a break because I am so worn out. To pull the covers over my head when nobody is around and sleep. Much better than pretending. I am learning to free myself. To let others help me to free myself.
The fatigue is huge. But I am healing. And it's worth it.
grace to you.
It wears me down. And yet....it has that good feeling that comes from really hard work. Though it looks like I'm doing nothing. I have a sense of accomplishment. I am proud of myself. Even when it looks like I'm just sleeping. Learning to rest is huge for me. Learning to take the time to simply think. Or give myself a break because I am so worn out. To pull the covers over my head when nobody is around and sleep. Much better than pretending. I am learning to free myself. To let others help me to free myself.
The fatigue is huge. But I am healing. And it's worth it.
grace to you.
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