Butt Heads

I know, it's not a very nice title.  But, it beat "Jackasses", soI'm improving.  There are some people in life who simply are mean.  Some of them seem like it from the very beginning...others...it takes awhile before you get what it is that makes you feel really uncomfortable. 
Right now I'm getting the "I love you, can I do anything?" moment of life.  It will not last, it is not the norm.  I cannot grow to hope for it or expect it.  Because soon...it'll be about money, about bullying, about shaming, about arguing.  It's this honeymoon kind of time.  You know, after the big getting things off his chest and being frustrated, then goes to nice...then the tension starts to mount again.  My tension has already begun because I know the drill.  The only good part is that I am not as pulled in as I used to be.  I am able to hear it and not think, "oh, I have to do this or reciprocate or whatever."  Because it's just a process.  To get to an end.  I am so over that.
Butt heads are all over in the world.  Sometimes you'll see me don my cap as well.  But, there are people who behave like butt heads occasionally and there are who just ARE butt heads.  They see only themselves.  The world revolves around getting what they want.  And, bullying, manipulating, misinterpreting all work together to make those around them feel crazy. Never able to figure out why things are so not right.  But the strangest thing of all is that the people who love and are committed to butt heads....blame themselves, work their rears off to make the world better and right, become solvers and fixers.  But no matter how hard they try...it is never "right".  Yet, still, they protect and cover and speak politely about the butt head.  It's really amazing. 
I have to say that butt heads serve a really good purpose in my life.  They remind me of who and what I want to be.  And what I don't. 
grace to you.