Getting Older

I am happy to be getting older.  And, I am disappointed. Not that I didn't teach all of those years.  Not that I stayed home with my kids.  Not that I got married.  Not that I am aging.  I am disappointed because I forgot the most important lessons that I learned when I was a child.  I forgot to take care of myself.  To be safe.  I had to learn that so young.  I would have thought that it would be second nature.  But, I worked hard in my life to truly grow and learn and to trust.  I worked on trusting God...and I found Him trustworthy, so I was more able to trust.  I never really looked at Him as a father figure back then...father figures only work when your own father was caring and there for you.  But, I viewed Him as the One who cared for me.  That would always be there. 
I am disappointed that I forgot the basic rule of loving myself.  I am learning again.  But, I still struggle.  Because I am older, there are some places that won't hire me.  Some people who view me as too old.  I spent so much time living for someone else.  I should have seen it. 
I'm getting older.  I like older.  Helps me to see more clearly, ironically.  As my physical vision goes, my life vision grows.  It's a good thing.
grace to you.